StressedMum Blog

Blogtober 2020 – Wherever Whenever

Today is day 23 of Blogtober 2020 and today the theme is Wherever Whenever.  I have kept coming back to this theme as I could not decide on how to interpret this theme,

I have been watching Married at first sight, a program where the bride and groom meet for the very first time at the alter as they say their wedding vows.  They are matched on a lot of science and various things.

Can you fall in love at first sight?

Growing up I used to dream of falling in love and getting married. Planning my dream wedding and colour schemes, of walking down the aisle as I took my wedding vows with the man I had fallen in love with and planned to stay with for the rest of my life.

I was with my husband for 11 years and we were married for 8 years.  It turned out to be a mentally abusive marriage, and it changed me a lot.  I carried on with my marriage as I though this was it and I would be the failure if we separated.

Things changed

One Sunday morning, I was up early as I could not sleep.  I logged on to a chat room I used to go on chatting to people around the world, I had made a few friends but no one was online. So, I logged into a new chat room and started to chat to a new person.  We clicked, I was married he had just gone through a divorce.

We ended up chatting all the time, and eventually met arranged to meet up (as friends) as he was not that far away from me.  As we had been chatting for ages we felt we knew each other, and when we met face to face it was like we had been friends forever.

Over time our feelings changed, I opened up and told him things about my marriage no one else knew.  We fell in love and I took the plunge to end my marriage.  21 years on we have just celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary.


I never really believed in fate before.  But that Sunday morning I believe it happened.  Neither of us were ever up at that time on a Sunday, and neither of us had been on that chat room before.  It was like it was meant to be.

Do you believe in fate?


Blogtober 2020 - Wherever Whenever

About Author

I am Sam and owner of StressedMum, I hope you enjoyed reading my latest post, I always love to read comments from my readers


  • Jo
    23 October 2020 at 11:15 am

    I certainly do. I think of the way I met my husband, it could have easily gone so differently. I’ve just read a book that sounds similar to the programme you’ve been watching.

    • admin
      23 October 2020 at 11:51 am

      I really do believe in fate as we would never have met any other way. What is the book I will have to read it

  • Anne Sweet
    23 October 2020 at 12:11 pm

    I knew my current husband for a long time before we got together, but yes, it was fate. My kittens escaped and as he lived in the neighbourhood he saw me out looking for them and eventually found them in a tree. He rescued them and came in for a coffee. The following week we were dating. I’m happy you were rescued from your unhappy marriage. I had hoped for rescuing from my first marriage for a long time and eventually it was another women that took him away. I wasn’t sad, I was grateful. x

    • admin
      23 October 2020 at 12:32 pm

      Fate works in many ways, I am glad you now have a happy marriage maybe we need the first one to show us what not to accept in our second marriages

  • Kim Carberry
    23 October 2020 at 8:26 pm

    That really does sound like fate.
    I met my fella online too and spoke to him before meeting in person so it felt like we’d known each other for years x

    • admin
      26 October 2020 at 9:23 am

      I think it was fate, a lot of people have met their partners online and it is a way to get to know someone before meeting face to face, no awkward silences as well

  • Jupiter Hadley
    29 October 2020 at 9:36 pm

    Fate is a hard one, I do believe you make your own luck. It sounds like you both were just what you needed.

    • admin
      30 October 2020 at 9:39 am

      I do agree you make your own luck but on the other hand do believe things happen for a reason


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