StressedMum
Baby ducks in a row following mother on road – Image Courtesy of Pixabay
Routine helps everyone develop the skills to perform specific tasks at a particular time of day, month, or year. Establishing patterns of behaviour related to health, hygiene and safety will carry on into adulthood when practised as a child. At the very least, your family will become better at doing tasks with minimal supervision. There are psychological benefits as well.
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ToggleBabies and toddlers are needy because they simply don’t have the faculties to care for themselves. And that’s where you come in. As a parent, you can establish routines around their schedule, whether it’s when they eat, play or sleep (see this handy Sleep Training 101 guide) that strengthens their emotional control. In essence, your kids begin to trust that you will provide what they need at a specific time, and they will expect it. Because of this, you can reduce the chances of tantrums and encourage good behaviour as particular times of the day are near.
You use routines all the time. Most of the time, you don’t even know you do it because it becomes learned behaviour. Learned behaviours are actions you consciously or subconsciously
make with minimal effort. In some cases, you might even do something without thinking about it. This is called second nature. A great example is backing your car out of a driveway which requires specific actions and a complex analysis of an area. And you do all of this effortlessly in a split second. You can apply the second nature technique to almost everything.
It helps to develop a good routine in almost anything you do. A solid routine will help you and your family become self-disciplined with specific tasks. For example, you probably don’t like brushing your teeth in the morning. But it’s an absolutely vital task that must be done. Therefore you develop the discipline to clean your teeth as soon as you get up, every single day. Over time, it becomes one small part of a more extensive morning routine that carries on throughout your life. Self-discipline like this can also be used for other practices like exercise and grooming.
A poll found that two out of three families lost sense of their morning routine during the pandemic. Morning routines are essential for critical tasks like getting the kids in the car to take to school. While this sounds easy, it is a series of small tasks towards a larger end goal. You can use a particular routine to encourage your children to work towards the goal while also preparing yourself. For example, all children need to be up at 7 am, cleaned by 7.20, dressed by 07.30 and fed by 7.50. Having them do this every day makes mornings so much easier.
One of the best reasons for establishing routines is to weed out any bad habits while making use of good ones. Doing the dishes is a perfect example. We all love eating. But preparing and cooking food makes quite a mess. And eating can make you tired. But it’s all too easy to leave the dishes at the side and “do them later”. Yeah right. This is a terrible habit that just makes more work to do later on. But you could develop a routine of washing the dishes immediately after eating. This is more hygienic and makes space for preparing the next meal.
If you are a parent of young children and teens, you know that getting them to bathe or shower can be a nightmare. However, a routine helps them develop the self-care skills to do this often. All they want to do is play Fortnite, so it can be tricky to get them to peel away from their TV screens. But you can help them understand that self-care comes before gratification and that it only takes five minutes. A quick shower is all it takes, and then they can get back to playing video games. Once they understand this, they will take care of themselves.
Many parents find it helpful to establish routines when taking care of children. There are many benefits, such as helping them become more independent and sticking to essential schedules. However, it can be tricky. So, here are some tips:
Identifying the tasks for a routine is simple. All you need to do is list what you do every day. Then it’s a case of sorting tasks in the order they need to be done. Small jobs make up a bigger goal. That is your routineAMP. Over time, the children will become self-disciplined.
Happy children holding hands – Pixabay
Children thrive when they feel safe and secure. Not knowing what will happen next is one of the biggest causes of stress in kids. When kids don’t know what will happen from one day to the next or where their next meal is coming from, it causes anxiety issues. You can help them feel safer and more secure about life if you help develop a routine around their needs and your own.
For example, a child will be happier in life if they know their evening meal comes at 5.30 pm every night. And they will be ready and adjust their life around it in anticipation.
You can use an established routine to reward children for a job well done. This can help develop a sense of accomplishment and the benefits of it early on. For example, happiness is linked to an adequate level of serotonin, which proceeds when you achieve something. Therefore, you can encourage accomplishments as your kids develop by rewarding them with praise and something they like when they successfully stick to their routines. For example, give your children an extra 10 minutes of screen time AMPif they do a bedtime routine without asking.
Just making life easier makes a case for establishing routines at home. With all the busy and hectic things you need to take care of, it can be a massive help if the children can take care of themselves with certain tasks. For instance, when they reach around age 6, they should be able to shower and dress themselves unsupervised. This frees up your time for getting other things done like preparing breakfast or attending to a younger child who needs more of your time. This can be a Godsend on one of those days where you just need things to go right.
Morning routines like getting ready for work are excellent at running a somewhat organized daily family life. But where you can really use a good routine is when you need essential things to do where everyone can chip in. Dinner time is a perfect example. You can get the entire household involved in helping out while preparing a meal. While it’s not a great idea to have young children around hot ovens and such, they love helping out with menial tasks. Such tasks include setting the table or organizing drinks, cups and juice as they sit and wait for their meals.
There are many routines you can use at home. Unfortunately, only 30% of modern families regularly eat together. But family mealtime is one of the most important where you might need some help. Kids are also better behaved when they know something good is coming. Additionally, you can use routines to help kids understand what to expect and when. This doesn’t always need to be meals. It could be a weekly walk in the park or going to their hobby like karate lessons. The expectation is a great motivator in kids and helps reduce uncertainty and anxiety.
You might want to do everything for your kids, but it’s not a good idea to do so. If you manage everything they do, they will have difficulty becoming independent. They might become reliant on you for things they should do themselves at an older age. They could also form unhealthy attachments that lower emotional stability as they develop. A routine helps kids become more independent and motivated to do so. They love being able to do things for themselves and will take pride in it. This makes them less likely to rebel against your authority and misbehave.
You use routines for everything. Getting up in the morning, going to bed at night or securing your home when you leave. You won’t even notice most of the things you do in a routine you won’t even notice. But children need to be taught early on, which has numerous benefits. Some of the biggest include raising independent children and encouraging good habits and self-discipline when they get older.
This is a collaborative post.
I enjoy dipping into the variety of your posts but this one was especially interesting and thoughtful. A lot of habits and behaviours come down to just one thing: routine. It makes such sense! The structure and expectations it creates are invaluable in the development of stable, happy children.
Routine is good and does help all family members
I think for my children, routines do makes them feel safe and secure like you mentioned as they know what to expect. And because they know what is expected of them, they learn quicker to become independent. My kids have been in routine as early as 6 months and i have never looked back since. They now go to bed promptly at 7pm and wake up promptly at 6am. It’s also good for me because I know what to do as well and can plan my day efficiently.
We always had routine with the kids, they need it as much as we do.
It can be important for children to have a routine. It helps get them used to doing specific things like having a bath or shower. Mine are all self sufficient when it comes to that now so it’s one less thing for me to do. Yaaaayyyyyyy!!!
I agree and getting them into routines, means you can start to let them take control.
I could not agree with this more! Routine deffo helps us and keeps us focused and organised, so we can make the most of our free time x
Routine is important especially those with younger children, as they need routine, and it does mean you can enjoy free time together without having niggling worries in the back of your mind