Motherhood, from the minute you find out you are pregnant, you start to worry about your unborn baby. As your bump gets bigger and bigger until, if like me you are the size of a blue whale, you worry about every twinge, movements etc, the list goes on. You go for scans and check ups, and you worry.
Then the panic sets in, that soon you will give birth to this baby growing inside you. You then have the worry of hearing your baby cry for the first time, are they ok, are they going to feed ok. This is also over powered by that unconditional love you have, a parent can never explain how that love feels. It is a love you never thought possible.
I loved becoming a mummy, I could sit and watch my baby sleeping for hours. Yes, you get the sleepless nights and in the early days all you seem to do is watch your baby sleeping, or you are feeding and changing them. Then comes the little gurgles and smiles and baby chatter. Believe me these are the days to cherish because all too quickly they grow into toddlers.
You know the toddler stage has arrived, when you start to get the answering back, ask them to do something you get no, they are not naughty as such but they need to learn about what is right and what is wrong. You worry about all the dangers around the home, you look at strangers in different ways. Are they going to communicate and interact with other children. You could have a long list of worries and still add to it.
You then get that first day of school. You are teary thinking, How can my baby be going to school already? Will they be ok without me all day? Will I be ok without my baby all day?
The truth is , no matter how hard it is for you as a mum, your little one needs to have a bit of time away from you. They need to interact with other children their own age, and they need to learn new things. While you sit there counting down the hours and minutes that you get them home again, and chat about their day and everything they have done.
You, then watch them grow, each year, they get bigger, they learn more, they get cheekier, they grow into this little person who you still look at the same way as you did the day they were born. Except they are not babies anymore they are young people.
This is where I am now, my daughter has hit 12, and is not a baby anymore (although she will always be my baby). We have moved to the next stage of having a bit of freedom, although it was short-lived, due to her illness, but we will get back to normality, hopefully, one day, where my stress and worry about how she is feeling and coping with the pain, will transfer to I hope she is safe, where she should be.
No wonder us mums get so stressed, but would we change it, I know I would not.
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