When you first start a family, you won’t overly have any idea of how it’s going to go. Or what being a mum and building a family is like. It’s hard, but it’s also incredible too. Yet sometimes, it’s hard to forget that. When you have a never-ending to do list and your kids have minds of their own, you feel as if you’re always going to be shouting and doing chores, disciplining and looking after people. Now, one thing’s for sure, if you see it that way, it’s always going to stay that way. Instead, you need to actively choose to make a change. To turn things around. To create the family life that you’ve always wanted. At first thought, this can seem hard – and it will be. But it’s far from impossible. Sure, there will be some resistance, but f you want a happy family life, you can have it.
So let’s start to look at how. Well, first of all, surely you realise that putting yourself into a stressful situation all day every day is not going to be bad for your health. Nor is it going to help you to be a fantastic mum. And, not only that, but it’s highly likely to impact on your relationship too. So instead of finding yourself with family law lawyers, it’s time to get proactive. Because how work on your family life can mean great things for your marriage or partnership as well as your children. And here’s how.
Starting With You
So first of all, let’s begin with you. Because this all does have to begin with you and what you bring to the table. This definitely does not mean that you have to change or that’s something wrong with you. That’s completely untrue. However, you do need to look at your own actions and how you talk and think, and see how you can improve here.
What You Want
First of all, you’re going to want to decide what you want. For this, you’re going to want to choose your ideal family life. What’s the perfect scenario? What does the ideal day look like to you? How do you feel in that situation? Start to think about what you really want, because then, you’re able to work out how you’re going to bring that happy life to life.
How You Approach Family Life
So now that you know what you want, it’s time to take a look at your family life now. So ask yourself, how do you approach it? How you do approach your day? What is your usual attitude to your family? Really think about how your thoughts or attitude or actions are setting the tone for your family.
Choosing To Change
But you also have to commit to yourself that you do want to change and that you’re going to want to do what it takes to make this happen. However the thing is, this isn’t about what you have to do to change yourself, but it’s just about changing your actions. Because here, if you can start to change your actions, they’ll have the most positive ripple effect in your family.
It’s All In An Act
Now that you know you want to change this, it’s time to make magic happen. And this is just so important. Because the second you realise that you can alter how your day plays out by how you talk and act and approach it, you’ll see that this is actually easy to do. But it does take practice.
Starting The Day Right
So first of all, you’re going to want to start each and every single day in a positive place. With gratitude and the very best intentions for how the day is going to go. And for this, the right morning habits can help you. Because if you’re getting up early and planning out how the day is going to go from a happy place, it’s going to all play out that way in front of you.
Changing Your Mind
But that’s just the start, because now, you need to work on changing your mindset. You have to not let things get to you or alter your new attitude and approach. Positivity is so important. Think about what you need to do so that you can create a positive and happy situation and scenario in front of you right now. It takes work, but your mind has the power to make this happen if you work on it.
Acting The Right Way
As a step on from that, you need to then make sure that your actions are mirroring your thoughts and the approach that you want to take. If you want a calm morning but you’re rushing or rolling your eyes or losing your temper, you’re not going to make this work. So actively think about your actions and proactively work on getting them in line.
Becoming The Change You Want To See
If you’re struggling here, or you’re wondering why you need to change first and not anybody else in the family, then this will be a powerful thought for you. Because for you to bring about family changes, you have to the power to set the tone. If YOU make changes, then your family are very likely to follow suit. So if you start working towards a happier family life, they’re going to mirror your actions.
However, you need to realise that this won’t be easy and it won’t always work right off the bat. But you have to be patient. Because it will start to play out in front of you if you keep on directing the attitude and how your family acts and reacts together. So practice patience and become a patient person. You need to give everyone time, because this can be a HUGE adjustment. And it’s going to take them some time to change too.
The Happy Family Life Toolkit
Then, you’re going to want to know what your simple go-tos should be for this. Because it’s all very well-being in the best mindset to be happy, but you then also have to make your family life fun too. And every family will be different. So you can take these ideas and use them, or you can create your own that are going to work best for your family. Here they are.
Love & Affection
The first thing is always going to be about love. Being loving. Showing love. And this can mean showing affection to your partner, as well as your kids. But this is the first steps because that loving bond can then allow you to get closer as a family. So proactively look to show affection and love your family, even if you think that they should know that you do, it’s time to make this change first.
Fun & Enjoyment
But then also, you just need to be able to have some fun too! Because life is for living – and your kids are only young once. So enjoy that. And commit to having fun with your kids so that you can actually love the days that you all get to spend together.
Quality Time & Support
Finally here’s something that is going to help you to really bond as a family and feel contentment and pride, is to spend quality time together as a family. It doesn’t have to be every day, but your family time should be something that you commit to, so that you can all enjoy yourself and love being a family together. But at the same time, offering that level of support to your kids and your spouse can also reinforce this feeling too.
Now, this one isn’t so much of a tool, but something that will ensure this all works out for you. Because this isn’t always going to go right the first time. Or the second. Or the tenth. Sometimes, you just have to keep on working at it. You have to regroup, take a step back, check your approach, and keep trying. Because some days are going to be easier than others, but you’ll get there. And if you’re grateful for the happy moments that you’re starting to really enjoy every single day, you know that you’re on the right track.
And that’s all there is to it! Sure, at first, it can seem like a lot of work to do. But you really do have to remember that this is your life – and you can do whatever you choose to do with it. However, you do have to actively want to create a happy home and then do what it takes to make that happen. Sure, sometimes, this will mean that you have to get really uncomfortable – vulnerable too. It may also mean that big changes need to be made. But if you, personally, and your family are better off for it, it’s definitely for the best. So go forth and enjoy your new-found happy family life that you’ve always been longing for.