A letter from the heart

Dear Daughter

You have been ill since New Years Eve, you have been in pain, and unwell for all this time. I know I tell you, but thought I would write a letter from the heart so you know you are not alone.

I have taken you to numerous Dr appointments, various hospital appointments, held your hand when having your many blood tests. Cuddled you, chatted with you when you have been able too. Gone out shopping to get you something you fancy to eat.

I have chased results, rushed around picking up various prescriptions.

When alone, I cry as I can not take away the pain you are in, I can not take away the sadness in your eyes. If there was a way I could be the one who is suffering I would swap in a heartbeat.

You have been so brave, you do not like the blood tests, but you just get on with it, you were a star when having your MRI scan.

I know you are scared, upset and miserable at the moment, you have no energy, if you do anything you are in pain in your head and legs.

I know you miss school, you miss your friends, I know you think I am nagging you or being mean trying to get you up for school, as you can not concentrate because of various things when you are there and, I know you are scared as I am that you are falling too far behind.

I am fighting for you everyday, with the health professionals who are trying to get you better and with school, to try to work out what is best to do. They are just as helpless as I am as to what to do for the best.

I make this promise to you though, I will not stop fighting, I will not stop trying to get you up and about and I promise I will find a medication that will help you maintain a normal life.

Dad and I have stopped your medication as they did not help with the pain and just made you sleep or left you spaced out.

My heart breaks a bit more each day to see you so ill and not know what it is or what to do, I am not sleeping properly as I am so worried.

Just remember I love you so very much, and I will not stop until I get my happy Daughter back.

Love you always

Mum xxx



    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 11:15 am

      Thank you, it is breaking my heart now x

  1. 29th February 2016 / 11:15 am

    It must be so hard seeing a loved one suffering like that. You’re in my thoughts x

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 11:52 am

      Thank you x

  2. Emma @ em's life in motion
    29th February 2016 / 11:27 am

    Lot’s of love, I really hope you get some answers soon,
    Em xXx

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 11:52 am

      Thank you, it is just the not knowing and not being able to get her into school and just seeing her miserable and not living the life a 12 year old should be x

  3. 29th February 2016 / 4:06 pm

    Aww this is so sad and it must be so so hard to watch, I do hope you find out what the matter is soon. x

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 5:37 pm

      Thank you, hopefully we will soon x

  4. 29th February 2016 / 4:16 pm

    So sorry to hear your daughter is ill. It’s always hard to see the ones you love the most suffering. Sending healing thoughts your way xx

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 5:37 pm

      Thank you, it is bad enough when it is just a few days but a nightmare this long x

  5. Fashion and Style Police
    29th February 2016 / 5:36 pm

    I hope your daughter gets better real soon x

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 5:36 pm

      Thank you x

  6. 29th February 2016 / 6:58 pm

    oh no I am so sorry to read this keep the faith and keep fighting and demanding to know what’s going on as you are doing x sending you and your daughter cyber hugs and love

    • admin
      29th February 2016 / 7:39 pm

      Thank you x

  7. Natasha Mairs
    29th February 2016 / 8:03 pm

    It’s horrible when your child is ill, but not being able to help is the worse feeling ever. I hope she gets better soon

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:55 am

      That has been the hardest thing, not being able to help her, to watch her every day x

  8. 29th February 2016 / 8:29 pm

    Oh Babe, STILL no concrete answers? This has been going on for far too long. Your poor daughter (and poor you, I can hear it is taking it’s toll). I know this is a bit meaningless as I’m just some random from the Internet but if there is anything you need help with (promoting your blog, keeping up with SM, guest posting etc.) just say the word and I’ll rally the troops. I have found the blogging community to be really supportive and I am sure there are tons of people ready to help out.

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:55 am

      Tori thank you for your offer of support, that means so much and the blogging community is such a supportive community x

  9. 29th February 2016 / 9:52 pm

    Poor thing does she have a chronic illness? What are the symptoms if you don’t mind me asking as I have health issues myself and some of what you were describing seems to correlate.

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:54 am

      No not as far as we know, I may message you about it though later x

  10. Liz Mays
    29th February 2016 / 10:18 pm

    It’s great that you are being so strong for her. This is such a sad but sweet post.

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:53 am

      Thank you, I have to be strong for her I am her Mum x

  11. 1st March 2016 / 2:41 am

    Oh no 🙁 I’m sorry hear that your daughter has been unwell. I do hope that she gets better soon xxx

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:52 am

      Thank you x

  12. 1st March 2016 / 7:38 am

    I am so sorry to hear this. I hope they find out what’s wrong soon and your daughter gets the medicine she needs. Sending you strength xx

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:52 am

      Thank you, hopefully we are on the road to recovery soon x

  13. 1st March 2016 / 8:03 am

    Sorry to hear about your daughter. It sounds like she’s got a great supportive mum watching her though.

    • admin
      1st March 2016 / 9:51 am

      Thank you, it has been such a nightmare x

  14. 2nd March 2016 / 12:20 pm

    Reading this breaks my heart! We always want the best for our children, and it hurts us when our children hurt. I hope you manage to get her the help she needs, and she has a much needed recovery x

    • admin
      2nd March 2016 / 12:29 pm

      Thank you, it is breaking my heart, I get up each day not knowing what to do, do I force her to try school, do I let her stay home to rest. I had to rush her to hospital again yesterday, just waiting on the consultant ringing me, but think we know what it is now x

  15. Idaintyit
    2nd March 2016 / 1:02 pm

    This is really heart breaking to read! I hope you get something sorted soon, it must be so hard!

    • admin
      2nd March 2016 / 5:31 pm

      Thank you, I seem to get told something one day, something different the next and nothing concrete. Hoping we are nearer to getting a proper diagnosis

  16. Catstello
    2nd March 2016 / 1:18 pm

    Sorry to hear your daughter is unwell, I hope she gets better soon xo

    • admin
      2nd March 2016 / 5:30 pm

      Thank you, unfortunately I think this is something more than just rest x

  17. Renna
    2nd March 2016 / 2:20 pm

    Aaaahhh bless, it’s so hard when it’s your kids. It’s that feeling of complete helplessness that is just so overwhelming. I do hope things get better for her. Thoughts are with you.

    • admin
      2nd March 2016 / 5:28 pm

      She has been ill for so long now, and I seem to have to fight every step to get some sort of help I do feel so helpless x

  18. 2nd March 2016 / 10:59 pm

    I’m sorry to hear that your little girl still isn’t well. Thanks for the update on your Facebook post, hope you’ll have a final diagnosis soon!

    • admin
      3rd March 2016 / 10:02 am

      Thank you, we were at the hospital again on Tuesday and been waiting for a phone call ever since x

  19. Georgina prince
    3rd March 2016 / 10:45 am

    Aww it’s so hard to see your kids being ill! It’s hard when any family member is ill. I hope she gets better soon! xxxx

    • admin
      3rd March 2016 / 11:19 am

      It is bad enough when they are ill, but 3 months later and still ill is heartbreaking, I am fighting all the way though. Thank you x

  20. 4th March 2016 / 10:07 am

    Oh my gosh, what an awful situation for all of you. I hope you get a diagnosis soon and a treatment that works so life can get back to normal

    • admin
      4th March 2016 / 10:19 am

      Thank you, it has been a nightmare but hopefully things are getting better

  21. 7th March 2016 / 12:05 pm

    I’m so sorry about your daughter. Praying you a diagnosis is found promptly xxx

    • admin
      7th March 2016 / 4:09 pm

      Thank you, it has been a nightmare journey, we have it down to one of two things now hoping it is the first and not the second though x

  22. 9th March 2016 / 5:29 am

    Really sorry to read that your daughter has been unwell for so long now. Hoping the medics can find some answers for you and she improves soon. It’s so worrying for us parents at times like this. I’ve been through it with my daughter now on 2 occasions when she was diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis and Crohn’s disease

    • admin
      9th March 2016 / 9:50 am

      Oh no bless her, they are treating her for Glandular Fever at the moment, but she is borderline ME, but they can not formerly diagnose this until she has been like this for 6 months

  23. 10th March 2016 / 3:32 pm

    Hmmm… three months with no answers… this is unreal long. You must feel so hopeless 🙁
    I hope you can find the strength and keep fighting and get to the bottom of it.
    I wish both, you and your little girl, a lot of strength.

    • admin
      10th March 2016 / 9:43 pm

      Thank you, I will keep on and on until I get some answers, I did speak to her Consultant last week medication has since been changed twice since then, but finally they are saying Glandular Fever but borderline ME as they can not fully diagnose ME until she has been like it for 6 months. We also have physio booked so am hoping things will start to improve. But I have promised her I will fight all the way to get her better

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